by Shane Foster
Reading time approx: 6 mins
Earlier in March saw the celebration of ‘International Women’s Day’ and this provoked a thought in my mind about what it would be like to move to full-time crossdressing, which in turn led me to ask the question – “what would it be like to make the change and become a woman full-time?”
I don’t necessarily mean moving to full gender reassignment, but maybe just taking the decision to become a full-time crossdresser, and making the first step towards transgender. Whilst I know that most people are happy to cross-dress as a social part of their lives, it does make me wonder when people choose to make the move permanent, and what it means to them and those around them, once they decide to live as a woman.
In the beginning – making the decision
As you will know from my previous blogs, I love nothing more than crossdressing and becoming my alter-ego. But at what point does this turn from weekend enjoyment to living as a woman full-time. For many crossdressers, the urge to dress in women’s clothes and make-up is nothing more than a desire – whether sexual or otherwise – it’s just a release. And it doesn’t matter whether your straight, gay or bi.
However, if you’re taking the decision to move to full-time crossdressing, then surely there must be more to it. This must come from a deep-seated desire to live as a woman, and may even come from a sense of being trapped in the wrong body. I have met many crossdressers who live this way both permanently, and semi-permanently, and in the vast majority of cases the reason given was “because I feel more myself when I’m dressed like this”.
Of course, for those who are ‘trapped’ in the wrong body, the move to full-time crossdressing is only regarded as a step towards the next stage in the process of becoming a full woman. Indeed, the move would then be regarded as a transition phase, allowing both the person and those around them to become familiar with their new identity.
Coming out to family and friends
So once you have taken the formal decision to move to full-time crossdressing, the next step is to ensure that your loved ones, and those closest to you, are fully aware of the decision. Of course no one is saying that this bit is going to be easy, but it’s crucial if you are to be happiest in your decision.
For some, this next step will be quite easy, particularly if your family and friends are already aware of your current crossdressing fantasies, particularly if they already get involved. That said, they may find it slightly harder to come to terms with once you say you are ready to go full-time. And when it comes to those who have no idea about your part-time passion, then this is like to come as a real shock!
However, you must remember that this is all about you, however selfish that may seem. At the end of day, you have not made this decision lightly, and you need to impress this upon those nearest and dearest to you when you sit them down to tell them. Afterall, you need them to fully understand your reasoning and to accept your decision.
One crucial thing to remember, and don’t let this put you off your decision, is that there may be some of your family and friends who just wont accept your decision, and may even want nothing more to do with you, and you have to be ready mentally for such an outcome. But don’t give up on them, try to make them understand why you have taken this decision and why it is so important to you. But ultimately, if they still don’t accept you for who you are, then you may just have to let them go in order to be true to yourself.
Life and work as a woman
So now that you have taken the decision to live as a woman full-time, and you’ve told your family and friends of your intentions, the next step is to formalise things in your life to make yourself into the woman you want to be. Now you may decide to change your name and identity officially, in order to have your official identity reassigned to your ‘female’ persona. There are plenty of organisations that can help with this, just make sure you follow all government guidelines to ensure you do this correctly.
Of course, whether or not you choose to change your formal identity, there is no restriction to how you choose to be known. In general life and work, you can be known exactly how you wish, and there can be no discrimination in the workplace if you wish to live and be known as a woman. Indeed, most employers today will be very supportive, just make sure you are open and honest with them, and your colleagues, about your decision. Afterall, you have been brave enough to make the transition, so they must accept this, and accept you for who you are – you deserve nothing less.
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